10 reasons you’re going to like us more in 2014

We’re both celebrating milestones this year, so we want to kick it off properly. With my big 5-0 looming in April (looks weird in print so I’m hoping it’s not true) and Molly’s Sweet Sixteen in August, 2014 is shaping up to be a big year.

Normally, we’re pretty disdainful of resolutions, particularly our own, because they fade quickly. People should do more than they say, achieve more than they announce. But, inspired by this morning’s frozen sunrise and Molly’s second straight weather induced day off, this year we’re all in.

I’ll start.

1) I will stop multi-tasking conversations. It isn’t admirable, or even necessary, it’s just rude. This year I vow to listen and appreciate the gift of someone else’s time, ideas and their generosity in sharing them with me. I will not watch their lips move as I silently reorganize my to-do list. I will not nod and continue to type on a keyboard. I will not form my response before they’ve completed their thought. In short, this year I vow to listen.

2) I will build a healthy, lasting relationship with a vacuum cleaner. Somewhere out there is an appliance that will want to hang with me for more than a month or two. I will stop forming unhealthy attachments that suck all my attention and then leave me in the dust. I will no longer contribute to the graveyard of broken machinery cluttering up my garage. This year, I will read the owner’s manual before I buy the appliance.

3) I will cease my 20-year old boycott of all Marquette Golden Eagle apparel, because, let’s face it, Willie Wampum was racist and Blueteaux was just embarrassing; because I’m a proud MU alumna and it’s time to move on; but mostly because my sweet nephew bought me a super cool Marquette Golden Eagles sweatshirt for Christmas and I want to wear it. Before I pull that sweatshirt over my head and muffle my voice, I would just like to add that Warriors are admirably fierce and brave and talented and everything I’d want my team to be. But, I’m over it. Thank you.

4) I will sing karaoke in a bar. Fueled by a couple of Red, White and Blue beers and an abiding love of Kris Kristofferson, I once sang “Me and Bobby McGee” at a classy Wells Street establishment, but that was more than 30 years ago. It’s time for an encore. This year, I’ll be brave.

5) I’ll stop talking about writing a book and actually do it.

Molly’s Turn

6) I will learn how to change a tire, because I don’t want to be the person stranded on the side of the road waiting for someone to change it for me. Being able to drive would be nice, don’t get me wrong that’s going to happen this year too, but the tire thing is just as high up there.

7) I will filet a fish, because all the cool chefs are doing it, and I won’t have my street cred ruined by a bony fish.

8) I will plant a rose bush, because they’re just so fancy. I imagine myself sitting by a window drinking tea, nibbling on fresh rose water scones, looking out over my well-tended rose, and, knowing me, speaking in a British accent.

9) I will finish crocheting the scarf I started in August, because it’s ridiculous how long it has taken me and now it’s just sad. It’s a nice scarf, but when I finally wear I’ll try to avoid mentioning that this scarf took over five months to knit.

10) I will successfully curl my hair with a curling iron, without anyone’s help. There will be no burning hair, and no blistered cheek. Despite the unfortunate end to 2013 in regards to me and the curling iron, I hope to lay aside my difference and tame the beast that is the curling iron, and by the end my hair with be as curly as Shirley Temple’s.