Three Days of the Kitchen Floor

“”It will happen this way,” I said to our little Gecko, who looked at me dubiously. “You may be walking. Maybe the first sunny day of the fall. And a car will slow beside you, and a door will open, and someone you know, maybe even trust, will get out of the car. And she will smile, a becoming smile. But she will leave open the door of the car and offer to give you a lift.”

And thus began our Three Days of the Kitchen Floor, in which our entire household had to vacate the premises while a team of agents restored the wooden floors in our very old house.

The operation required a planning meeting, seven backpacks and a Google Doc.

“So, I’ll pick him up here and you drive them there and then we’ll go up there,” I said slowly while my feeble brain whirled. “And we’ll move all of the furniture and appliances over there.”

I mean, what could go wrong?

I maintained this optimism (minus the hubris) even after I dropped my mother-in-law’s prized and shockingly heavy hutch directly on my bare foot (breakfront indeed!) as we lugged it out of the dining room.

“We’ve got this!” I cheerfully said to myself as I worked up a sweat yesterday morning, tossing toothbrushes into various backpacks, tying shoes and searching frantically for the only garage door opener not currently in the locked garage.

Found it! Whew!

Lastly, I gathered up Miss Dino, our reclusive leopard gecko, and carried her out of the house.

“I’ve got a plan,” I told her. “I don’t know if it’ll work or not, but I’ll need your help.”

She rolled her cute little eyes.

“Have I ever denied you anything?”

She looked appalled though as, with the help of an accomplice, I drove her 2.7 miles to the pristine home of Grandma Peggy, who had agreed to babysit her grand-gecko.

I got Miss Dino settled, filled her water bowl and gave her a little pep talk.

“It didn’t have to end this way,” she said.

“Of course it did.”

I don’t know why I remember this movie so well (maybe because I remember every Robert Redford movie I’ve ever seen well?) but it popped into my head while we were talking about the three days we were going to have to be out of our house.
We’ll be commuting from our cabin for the next three days, and I thought the analogy was kind of chuckle-on-the-drive-home funny. Thanks for indulging me.

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