An unexpected guest

Did you ever have a houseguest you weren’t prepared to host (perhaps because your husband forgot to tell you they were coming?)

Well, that’s the way I feel about fall this year. It’s a nice, pleasant season and all. I just wasn’t ready to welcome it in.

It’s all good, though. It only takes a few minutes of mild panic, a swift change of sheets and attitude, and you can sit back and enjoy the unexpected pleasure of company.

I wasn’t ready for fall this year because summer was such a sodden mess. If humans could mildew, I would be walking around like a green speckled freak. We’ve had so much rain, our dehumidifier has developed a smoker’s hack and our sump pump hose has been rising occasionally in a manner that might suggest it is giving us an obscene gesture.

I know I’m the one who just recently wrote about the pleasures of walking in the rain, but sheesh! A person could develop leptospirosis from dragging their soggy feet through all that standing water. (I know! I looked it up!).

So, I say sayonara summer of 2019. Don’t let our broken rain gutter smack you on the backside.

And Hello Autumn – you gorgeous mascot of the Midwest. Welcome to our exhausted abode. We’re ready for your honey crisp apples and pumpkin spiced everything. We love the way you Jackson Pollock the landscapes around here and fancy up the joint.

You bring such life to the neighborhood with your fat, scurrying squirrels and elegant cranes. Lately, everywhere I look I see monarch butterflies, which are basically little flying, magical billboards for the glory of fall.

And you smell so good! All cinnamon apple-ly, smoky and clean. I’d tell you I like your verbs too because they make my mouth water (roast? bake? mull?), but I don’t want to scare you away. I know exactly what waits on the other side of those red-gold leaves of yours and I’m in no hurry to see it sweep in.

So, come right on in, Midwestern Fall. Make yourself comfortable. You’re welcome to stay here as long as you’d like.