Earlier this year I attended a class in Mindful Meditation, taught by Pandit Dasa, a Mindful Leadership and wellbeing expert who has written books and traveled the world spreading his message of Conscious Living.
I’m pretty sure I failed.
Though I kept yanking it back, I simply could not keep my toddler mind from wandering away.
He invited us to sit comfortably on the floor and come into the present moment, while I briefly panicked and then gave myself a stern lecture.
“A dress? Seriously? What were you thinking?”
I folded my creaky legs into a pretzel-legged position I had not achieved in years, and then modestly spread my jacket out over my bony knees. He encouraged us to clear our mind of clutter.
I looked regretfully over at my face-down cellphone and wondered if I had allotted enough time for this session.
We breathed deeply together and focused on the deep exhalation.
I concentrated hard on resetting my mind, relaxing my body and quieting my nerves. At the same time, I swatted drifting thoughts away like annoying lake flies.
Breathe. “Did I shut my ringer off” Swat!
Breathe. “Wait. Was that my stomach? Oh, man. I should have eaten lunch before I did this.” Swat!
Breathe. “This feels great! Deeply cleansing! I can’t wait to tell Katherine I’m doing this.” Swat!
“Good lord. Stop thinking and just breathe! You’re wasting your session!” Swat! Swat!
Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
“Hey, there! I think you’ve got this!” Swat!
In the end, the poor man asked us to commit to five minutes of mindful meditation a day. Five minutes! That’s all!
Eagerly, I agreed.
“Pfft. Five minutes. I could do this stuff in my sleep!”
That was more than three months ago. I have not mindfully meditated since.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME??? Swat!
Today, I vow to mindfully meditate and I hope to do it with some of the people I know.
But, I’m pretty sure I need your help.
Do you mindfully meditate?
Do you have an apps or website that help you?
If so please comment. I could use all the help I can get.