How to Survive Homecoming Without Really Trying (A post by Molly)

Last Monday marked the beginning of homecoming week for several schools in our area including my own. Seeing as I survived my very first homecoming dance without any serious injuries, I feel I know a little something about high school dances and I feel obligated to share my expertise for next year’s freshmen. Here are a few simple steps I like to call “How to Survive Homecoming Without Really Trying.”

  1. Don’t spend too much thought on your shoes. Chances are you’ll only be wearing them for pictures. In fact, check them at the door so you don’t have to worry about them. If you follow step #2 you won’t want to be wearing shoes at all. Also try not to look at the bottom of your feet throughout the whole dance. Don’t even think about what might be clinging to them. Wash your feet as soon as you get home.
  2. Spend as much time on the dance floor as possible. It doesn’t matter if you can’t dance; there’s always going to be someone who’s worse than you. It’s called a dance for a reason, so don’t fight it. And if your dance is anything like mine, there won’t be anything else to do but dance. Towards the end of the night keep dancing as much as possible, because the longer you stand still, the more you’ll notice how much your legs hurt.
  3. Try not to be too picky on what songs you dance to. The worst songs are generally the catchiest, so everyone will be singing along and dancing. It’s hard not to dance when the whole gym is singing loudly and totally off key. I.E. When Rebecca Black’s “Friday” starts playing, don’t scoff about the horrible lyrics and complain that it’s Saturday, just start dancing.
  4. Above all, have fun. If you come to homecoming thinking you’re aren’t going to have any fun, then chances are you won’t have any fun. If you go in excited about how much fun you’re going to have at the dance, then you’re probably going to have a lot of fun. As my mom always says “How do you have fun at a homecoming?You have fun at homecoming.” It’s as simple as that.
If you’re lucky enough to have one, let your older sister do your make-up.
Take pictures with your grandma if you’re lucky enough to have one.
Homecoming math is pretty easy. There’s nothing wrong with the ratio of seven girls and three guys.
Don’t let your elegant clothes and uncomfortable shoes stop you from having fun at the playground.

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