Captain’s log Stardate 2016: The pre-Thanksgiving grocery shop

Enter through the liquor store and note disturbing lack of carts. Successfully procure the extra large variety, and partially fill it with a hopefully appropriate selection of alcohol. Thus fortified, head west and cautiously begin negotiating a produce section teaming with Klingons. Seek refuge in the paper product aisle (while conveniently securing a 12-mega roll [...]